Local News

Princesshay's dirty little secret

If you ask anyone what they think of the Princesshay shopping centre you're bound to get a mix of opinions, but we can exclusively reveal the dirty little secret hiding behind the bright lights and shiny façades.

Whilst Derek Leedham, project liaison manager for Sir Robert McAlpine, is patting himself on the back for a job well done we can reveal how shopping in Princesshay is contributing to global warming.

It appears that when the delivery routes underneath Princesshay were designed, not enough room was given for lorries to drop off their loads and turn around. This means that the larger lorries, bringing your fancy new goods to the stores are being replaced by two smaller trucks.

This is doubling the amount of carbon and other noxious gasses being released into the atmosphere as twice the amount of trips are being made than there should have been.

For a cock up like this we would have been sure that Carillion would have been involved somewhere along the line, but they were busy fucking up our schools at the time.