Local News

Making crime illegal

Exeter's Express and Echo have launched their most baffling campaign to date. Having had a part in the outlawing of cool swords they now want to ban people driving whilst using mobile phones.

Apparently, using their best investigative journalists they revealed that people all over Exeter are still using their mobile phones in the car. No shit Sherlock. Just open your eyes when you're near a road, it's hardly hidden in the seedy underbelly of the city.

Presumably the Echo editors want to see faster results this time as the ban on fantasy and samurai swords took ages to put into place. By banning something which is already illegal they can claim a victory straight away.

Next month they will be campaigning to make all crime illegal throughout the country. You can expect to see the police pursuing murder suspect and rapists after this enlightening new way of thinking.

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