World News

Have you seen this shit?This man is wanted by British Transport Police for making fudge dragons on at least 30 trains since August causing over £60,000 worth of damage.

Madonna's brown baby reposessedMadonna seems to have made a rather large oversight in her adoption of an orphan in the fact that it already has parents.

'Blade' star on gun rampageIn a scene reminiscent of the OJ Simpson chase, actor Wesley Snipes is currently being sought out by American police after destroying a shopping mall last night.

Madonna wants a brown babyHuman rights representatives have said that it would be unlawfull for Madonna to adopt a child from Malawi as she's a raving fruitcake.

No love for Recycling SheriffSince his instatement in August, the Teignbridge Council Recycling Sheriff has not been called once to deal with any refuse related issues, after asking for information about the down dirty outlaws who ain't recycling.

Is this gormless idiot Jesus?Our survey said 'No', but Chris DeBurgh believes he has the gift of healing hands.

Bude Beauty Contest ends in disasterAfter an unfortunate omission from the rulebook, the annual Bude Beauty Contest has been won by what can only be described as a shambling man beast.

DOA: Too shit for cinemasIt seems that the new computer game/film crossover has been deemed too crap to be shown in cinemas in the UK after it's release on the 15th of September.