World News

Independant school saved by alcoholic monksThe only Catholic secondary school in Cornwall has been purchased by the pissed up monks of Buckfast Abbey.

Large arses banned in BrazilLocal station Mix Radio were running a competition inviting pupils to send in pictures of their classmates' and teachers' backsides.

Bikini speed banditsIn Denmark a new kind of speed check is coming in to action, with an inovative way of getting drivers to slow down.

Man Flu is realA new poll has revealed that man flu is a real, tangible condition, suffered by men the world over.

Scared shitless?The National Phobics Society has estimated nearly 4 million Britains are affected by a fear of going to the toilet.

Borat storms US and DBorat: Cultural Learning of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan was the number one grossing film in the US this weekend, taking $26.4m.

Cornish Oxo freakStephen Kay, 39, used to be a fat bastard, but over the last year all he's eaten is Oxo. He now weighs 15.2 stone, down from 31.5.

KFC: Hiring the dregs of societyYet again the staff at the local KFC have proved to be the closest thing we have to the missing link with sub-human inteligence and an inept ability to get everything wrong.