Agony Aunt

Problems with Veg

Dear Lilu

I'm quite embarrssed and haven't been able to talk to anyone about my problem. Last Saturday I was in my bedroom and decided to experiment with a carrot and it is now stuck in my back passage. I am too embarrssed to go to hospital or my GP, please can you suggest a home remedy to ease the pain ?

Please can you reply asap as the pain increases hourly.

Anon, Cullompton

Dear Anon,

My, my, what a predicement you have gotten yourself into... Try using vasaline around the rim or laxatives to try and flush it out, or you could ask Fred to help you out (see other letters). I've never heard of anyone using a carrot before, well not a bloke anyway... but then again you do live in cullompton.

If you're still having problems, give NHS Direct a call on 0845 4647. They probably can't help, but it'll give them a laugh...

I hope you sort yourself out soon because, as you say, the pain must be unbearable!

- Lilu